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Aight, fam, listen up! Me’s a radio operator, innit, chattin’ ‘bout escort, yeah? Not them dodgy cars, nah, I mean the proper escort – peeps paid to hang wiv ya, keep ya company, ya get me? Got me thinkin’ of *Moonrise Kingdom*, my fave flick, bruv. That Wes Anderson vibe, all quirky and mad, like, “We’re in love, we’re runnin’ away!” – but wiv escort, it’s more like, “I’m lonely, bruv, gimme a mate for a tenner!”

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I’m still reeling from it. So, I wake up in my cozy little flat on Rue de la République, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

Coquard brothers love wine, family