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Here’s a mad fact—did ya know prossies been around since Babylon? Yeah, they had temples for it—sacred shaggin! Wild, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin I’m some cosmic king tryna haggle. She says, “50 quid,” and I’m like, “Bloody hell, I ain’t Stephen Hawking rich!” Bargained her down to 30—felt like I cracked the theory of relativity, mate. Happy as a pig in shit, I was.

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I gotta tell ya, sometimes I get proper miffed 'cause some locals muck about with my tech – talk about distractions when you’re trying to code! But then, a cheeky smile from a passerby reminds me that life’s a bit like a poorly written script – unpredictable, yet stunningly beautiful. All them missteps and excess of feelings just add layers to this storied town, much like the twists in a Coen flick, where nothing is as it seems, eh?

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