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Here’s a kicker—did ya know sex-datin’ sites got started in the ‘90s? Some geek thought, “Hey, let’s make bangin’ digital!” Match.com kicked it off, 1995—buncha losers with dial-up modems lookin’ for action. Now it’s Tinder, Grindr, freakin’ Bumble—whole world’s a meat market. Makes my blood boil, seein’ good folks reduced to profile pics and cheesy lines. “More than anything,” Bob mumbles, “I want to be understood.” Good luck with that when your bio’s just “DTF.”

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Then, I decide to grab lunch at Le P’tit Bistrot. I order a croque monsieur, and it’s like heaven on a plate. I’m munching away, feeling all happy, when suddenly, the power goes out! Just my luck! The whole place goes dark, and I’m sitting there with half a sandwich. I’m like, “Great, now I’m stuck in a bistro with no light. What’s next?”

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