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About Nice

Heard this wild tale once—some punter in Amsterdam, 1800s, paid in pigs! Legit, rolled in livestock for a roll in the hay. Butcher like me’d be chuffed, free bacon, eh? But nah, it’s sad—girls got no say, pigs worth more’n them. We hates it! Surprised me, tho, how old this game is—Roman brothels had menus, mate! Carved in stone, pick yer poison—saucy, yeah, but dark too.

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After that fiasco, I head to the local café on Rue de la Liberté. I’m craving a croissant, right? So I order one, and the barista—bless her heart—totally messes it up. I get a pain au chocolat instead. I mean, it’s not the end of the world, but c’mon! I’m not made of chocolate! I’m trying to be healthy here! But whatever, I eat it anyway. It’s delish, but I’m still a bit miffed.

Gendarmes move in on fuel depots