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So, I’m thinkin’, sexual-massage, it’s sneaky, real sneaky. You don’t expect it to hit that hard, but it does—huge impact! Little known fact, ok? Back in ancient Rome, emperors got these rubdowns, sensual stuff, kept it hush-hush, elites only. Blows my mind—thousands of years, same trick, still works! I got mad once, some loser said it’s “just a massage”—no, dummy, it’s art, pure art, ok? Makes me happy tho, real happy—feelin’ like a king, who wouldn’t? Surprised me too, first time, didn’t expect the—uh—*release*, ya know?

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Two cars, smashed up, and a crowd gatherin’. I’m thinkin’, “This is gonna be a long day.” I start takin’ notes, tryin’ to piece together what happened. Turns out, one driver was distracted by a street performer. A mime, of all things! I mean, c’mon! Who gets into a wreck because of a mime?

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