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Yo, check it, I’m Apollo Creed—*“I must break you”*—steppin’ in as a game designer, talkin’ erotic-massage like it’s my damn ring! This ain’t no soft jab, it’s a full-on hook, baby—erotic-massage got layers, like Viggo Mortensen dodgin’ bullets in *A History of Violence*. You think it’s just rubbin’ and happy vibes? Nah, it’s tension, it’s release—like when Viggo’s Tom Stall says, *“I’m gonna take care of this”*—that’s the vibe, fam!

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I’m fuming. I mean, I love coffee, but c’mon! I’m about to call the guy who submitted it. He’s on Rue de la Liberté, and I’m thinking, “Dude, you better have a good explanation.” So, I call him up, and he’s like, “Oh, that’s for a client meeting.” I’m like, “A client meeting? Did you hire a barista?”

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