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About Nice

Lemme tell ya somethin’—I tried it once. Matched with this chick, bio said “adventurous.” Thought, “Hell yeah, jackpot.” Turns out, “adventurous” meant she wanted to bang in a cemetery. I’m like, “What is this, a rendition site?” Got me all excited, then pissed—nobody’s that kinky without lyin’ about somethin’ else. Probably married. Everybody lies, told ya. Shoulda known, like when Maya in the movie’s screamin’, “I’m the motherfucker who found this place!”—except I didn’t find shit but a headache.

Les Meilleurs Lieux Coquins de Toulon (83000), Var, Provence-Alpes-Côte d'Azur

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But then, outta nowhere, it started to rain. Like, seriously? I thought I was in a sunny paradise, not a water park! I ducked into a café on Rue des Arts, and guess what? They had the best hot chocolate. I mean, it was like drinking a hug. I was feeling all warm and fuzzy inside, but then I overheard this couple arguing. Like, come on, guys! You’re in Toulon! Chill out!

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