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About Lille

What pisses me off? Liars, man. Fake profiles, fake pics – why bother? Had this one dude – yeah, I swing both ways, sue me – sayin’ he’s ripped, shows up lookin’ like a potato. I’m like, bro, own it! Confidence is sexier than abs. Got me yellin’ in my head, “Quit fuckin’ around!”

How do I find a hookup on an app?

First off, I hit the streets of Rue de la République. It’s like the main drag, ya know? I’m just chillin’, minding my own biz, when I see this old dude trying to cross the street. He’s like a turtle on a mission. I’m thinkin’, “C’mon, man, you can do it!” But nah, he’s takin’ his sweet time. I almost yelled, “Hurry up, grandpa!” but I held back. Gotta keep it classy, right?

Michelin bestows rare third star on 'champagne chef' Lallement