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But ugh, the flakes—THEY PISS ME OFF! “Oh, let’s meet!”—then ghosted. I’m sittin’ there, dressed up, lookin’ like a fool. Hate that crap! Or the ones who catfish—show up, and I’m like, “You ain’t her!” Sarcasm’s my shield, bro—“Wow, you’re a real Picasso with filters!” Sex-dating’s a gamble—win big or crash hard.

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Then I hit up the Place Charles de Gaulle. It’s this cute little square, and there’s this fountain that’s just... magical? I dunno, it’s like the water dances or something. I sat there for a bit, just soaking it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, splashes water everywhere! I’m soaked! I mean, c’mon, kid! I’m trying to enjoy my moment here!

Peterborough artist Laurel Paluck to host fall writing retreat in France