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I tried it once, got catfished hard – chick said 5’9”, rolled up 4’11” in heels! Pissed me off, man, I’m Apollo fuckin’ Creed, I don’t shrink for nobody! But then she was cool, we vibed, smashed anyway – “I must break you!” – and I ain’t mad no more. Funny how that flips, huh? Sex-dating’s chaos, but it’s real. Little fact for ya: back in ‘90s, pre-internet, folks used newspaper ads for this shit. “Single male, 30, seeks freaky Friday” – same game, slower pace!

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So, I hop out, and there’s this festival or somethin’. People everywhere, music blaring. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” But then I see this little kid, maybe 5 or 6, dancing like he’s on fire. I can’t help but laugh. He’s got moves! I’m thinkin’, “Man, I wish I had that energy.”

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