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Mr. T here, y’all! I pity the fool who don’t get erotic-massage right! So, check it—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah, it’s deep, sensual vibes. Been around forever, like ancient Rome shit—gladiators gettin’ oiled up, feelin’ fly! Mr. T digs that history, yo. Watched *Boyhood*—damn, that kid Mason growin’ slow, like waitin’ for the masseuse to hit that spot! “Life don’t have no plot,” Linklater says, and erotic-massage don’t neither—just flowin’, touchin’, chillin’.

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Later, I’m trying to finish up some reports, and my computer crashes. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!” I swear, I could’ve thrown it out the window. But then I remember, we’re on Rue de la République, and I don’t wanna be that person.

Olympic Torch Relay: Follow the flame around France’s UNESCO World Heritage Sites