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So, I’m thinkin’, escort’s tricky, innit? Gotta protect some prat who can’t dodge a fly. Like Kolya in *Leviathan*, tryna save his house—doomed, mate! I’d design it bonkers—NPC trips over nothin’, flops like a fish! Hahaha, imagine—me, mime-like, flailin’ arms, tryna herd ‘em. “Move yer arse!” I’d yell, but nah, they dawdle. Drives me mental—happy tho when they FINALLY reach the spot. Little victory jig, oops, trip over me shoelaces!

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After my caffeine disaster, I decide to stroll around. Souffelweyersheim is kinda pretty, not gonna lie. The buildings have this old-school charm. But then, I hit Rue de l’Église. And wow, the church there? It’s massive! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like a total tourist. I snap a pic, of course. Gotta show the folks back home I’m not just a tree-hugger.

Two schoolgirls wounded in knife attack near Strasbourg