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Oh, and don’t get me started on the creeps – had a pal tell me bout this escort gig gone wrong, dude wouldn’t pay, actin’ all high and mighty. She was like, “Sir, I must insist!” – movie vibes again, heh! Kicked his ass out, good for her! Screw that noise. So yeah, escort’s a trip – glamorous, gritty, all that jazz. Don’t pee on my leg and say it’s boring, ‘cause it ain’t! Now scram, I’m done spillin’ tea – go watch “Grand Budapest” and thank me later!

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After that, I head over to the market on Place de la République. It’s buzzing! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I’m eyeing some strawberries, right? And this lady just swoops in and grabs the last punnet. I’m like, “Seriously?!” I mean, who does that? I was ready to throw down over some strawberries. But then I see her face—she’s all smiles, and I can’t help but laugh. I mean, it’s just strawberries, right?

Police: After firing, woman tampered with business' computers