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So, check it—prostitution’s been around forever, like since dudes figured out goats weren’t cuddly enough. Fun fact: back in ancient Babylon, temple gals hooked up for “sacred” cash—wild, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ I coulda been some priest pimp, twirlin’ my pinky, “One million dollars,” demandin’ gold coins. Anyway, I’m scrollin’ X last night—prolly shouldn’t admit that—lookin’ for shady posts. Found this chick, calls herself “Roxy,” says she’s “discreet, upscale, 5-star.” I’m like, “Sheesh, upscale? What, you servin’ caviar with that?” Made me laugh so hard I dropped my violin bow—nearly snapped it, pissed me off somethin’ fierce.

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After that, I head back to the shop, still grumpy. I’m sharpening knives, scissors, whatever comes my way. Then, this lady walks in, all frantic. She’s like, “I need this knife sharpened NOW!” I’m thinking, “Lady, chill, it’s just a knife.” But she’s got this wild look in her eyes. Turns out, she’s hosting a dinner party, and her guests are gonna be there in an hour. No pressure, right?

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