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About Lyon

So, check it—sexual-massage, it’s this wild mix of skill and, uh, charm, ya know? Like Daniel Plainview in *There Will Be Blood*—he’s out there diggin’ for oil, ruthless as hell, and I’m thinkin’, “I’m an oil man!” Well, these massage folks, they’re like, “I’m a pleasure man!” or lady, whatever, no judgin’ here. They got hands that work magic, slippin’ and slidin’ with oils, makin’ stress vanish—poof! Little known fact: back in the day, some ancient Greeks were all about erotic rubdowns, callin’ it a “health thing.” Yeah, right, sure, buddy, “health.” Wink wink.

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Then, I see this stand selling local cheese. I’m a sucker for cheese, so I’m like, “Gimme some of that!” The vendor is super friendly, and we start chatting about the best cheese pairings. I’m getting all excited, thinking about how I can incorporate this into a game mechanic. Cheese as a power-up? Genius!

Tiny French Town Demands the Restitution of a Religious Reliquary From the Met