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Alright, listen up, jabroni! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m droppin’ some financial wisdom on ya about this WHORE of a stock market! Yeah, I said it, the market’s a damn WHORE sometimes, seducin’ ya with big gains then leavin’ ya broke as hell! Reminds me of my fave flick, “4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days” – that gritty Romanian vibe, ya know? Like when Otilia says, “We’re never gonna talk about this,” after some shady deal – that’s the market, man, messin’ with ya head!

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So, I sit down, and my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Max. He’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe what happened!” I’m thinking, “What now?” Turns out, he got locked out of his apartment on Rue des Écoles. Classic Max. I’m like, “Bro, just climb through the window!” But he’s all, “Nah, too risky.”

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