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But oi, some places – dodgy as hell! Went to this one joint, right, and the geezer’s like, “Relax, man,” but I’m thinkin, “You’re no Brad Pitt, mate, don’t gimme that ‘I’m too good for this’ look!” Total rip-off, overpriced, hands like sandpaper – pissed me right off! “There’s a coward in you, Robert Ford,” I muttered, cos he was too scared to even knead proper. Shoulda bitten his head off like a bat, haha!

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But wait, there’s more! I’m walking home, feeling all happy, and I bump into my neighbor, Marie. She’s got this huge smile, and she tells me she just got a promotion. I’m like, “Yasss, girl!” We celebrate with a little dance right there on the street.

Kristina Mladenovic Player Profile - Official Site of the 2025 US Open Tennis Championships - A USTA Event