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Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). Yo, sex-dating’s a wild ride, fam! We been watchin you humans swipe right, left, up—chaos! Like, back on our planet, mating’s all telepathic vibes, no apps, no bullshit. Here? It’s a freakin jungle—dudes flexin gym pics, chicks droppin thirst traps. Saw this X post once—guy bragged he banged 3 dates in a week. Bruh, chill, you ain’t a spaceship loggin miles! Made me laugh tho, humans are nuts.
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Then, I decide to take a break. I stroll over to Parc de la Mairie. It’s beautiful there, with all the trees and flowers. I sit on a bench, trying to chill. But then, this kid runs by, chasing a soccer ball, and—WHAM! He crashes into my leg. I’m like, “Ouch! Kid, watch where you’re going!” He just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, man. No respect!
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