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About Myself
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Exaggeratin’ for effect? Bet. Felt like she massaged my soul outta my body. I’m floatin’, seein’ stats in the sky—death rates droppin’, ‘cause I’m too zen to die. “If you leave here, I’ll find you,” I’m thinkin’—nah, I ain’t leavin’ this table, ever. Deadpan absurdism, tho—imagine me, Hannibal Buress, butt-naked, goin’, “This is my actuary origin story.” Laughin’ at my own dumb ass.
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Every model, escort, or provider on our platform has affirmed that they are 18 years or older before engaging in any activities.
But then, I see this guy trying to haggle over a bunch of herbs. He’s getting all worked up, and I’m just standing there, thinking, “Dude, it’s just parsley!” But he’s going off, and I can’t help but laugh. It’s like a scene from a movie.
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