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Look, escorts ain’t just bangin’ for bucks. It’s a gig, a grind—psychology too. They read suckers like me better than I read X-rays. “Everybody lies,” so they play along, nod, smile, cash the check. One time, heard this story—dude paid 5 grand for an escort to just *talk* at a conference. No sex, just arm candy. Blew my mind! Smart move tho, tax write-off maybe? Financial planning tip: don’t try that, IRS ain’t that dumb.

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After that, I decided to stroll by the Église Saint-Nicolas. It’s this gorgeous church, right? But as I’m walking, I trip over my own feet. Classic me. I’m sprawled out on the cobblestones, and this old lady walks by. She just looks at me and says, “You okay, young man?” I wanted to shout, “No, I’m not okay! I just fell in front of a church!” But I just laughed it off. Gotta keep it cool, right?

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