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Little fact tho—Ancient Rome had this shit on lock. They called it “frictio,” fancy as hell. Rich folks gettin’ oiled up, livin’ large. Me? I’m just tryna not slip off the table. Favorite part? When they hit that neck spot—ooh, chills, fam! Surprised me first time, like, “Damn, that’s allowed?” Almost too good—exaggeratin’ for drama, I’m yellin’, “I’m cured, doc!” Deadpan, tho—nobody laughs.

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Then, we decide to stroll by the river. The Isère is beautiful, especially at sunset. I’m feeling all the feels. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m thinking, “C’mon, guys, it’s a lovely day!” But they’re just going at it. I can’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, it’s about who left the cap off the toothpaste. Seriously?

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