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Oh, and get this—there’s this story, swear it’s true, some escort driver in Brazil hauled a freakin’ goat in his backseat! Dude was like, “Gotta get this goat to grandma!”—straight outta “City of God” weirdness. I laughed my ass off, picturin’ that goat bleatin’ while the car’s zoomin’. Bet the driver was all, “Run, run, or you’ll be caught!”—ha, classic!
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First off, I decided to hit up the local boulangerie on Avenue de la République. You know, the one with the best croissants? I’m talking flaky, buttery goodness. I get there, and the line is out the door! Like, c’mon people, it’s just bread! But whatever, I’m patient. I wait, scrolling through my phone, half-listening to some dude ranting about politics behind me. Ugh, can’t we just enjoy our pastries in peace?
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