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About Bordeaux

So, sexual-massage—been around forever, man. Ancient Greeks? Oiled up and rubbin’—called it *apotherapy*. Bet they didn’t charge a million bucks tho! Makes me mad—why’d we wait so long to hype this? Modern spas act all fancy, but it’s OG as hell. Saw this X post once—dude swore Cleopatra got ‘em daily with rose oil. Prolly true, she was extra like that.

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First off, I head to the market on Place de l’Église. You know, the one with all the fresh produce and those cute little stalls? I’m all about that fresh fruit life. Grabbed some strawberries, and OMG, they were like candy! But then, outta nowhere, this old dude bumps into me. Like, come on, man! Watch where you’re going! I spill my strawberries everywhere. I’m standing there, fuming, while he just mumbles something in French. I’m like, “Dude, I don’t speak ‘clumsy old man’!”

An Accidental Stroke Of Genius