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I be scrollin’ Tinder, seein’ chicks with filters thicker than my chain. Dudes too, flexin’ pics from 2012—boy, you ain’t foolin’ nobody! Got me mad as hell, swipin’ left like I’m wipin’ crumbs off my Gucci. But then—BOOM—this one shorty hit me up, convo flowin’ like syrup on waffles. We link, and it’s all good ‘til she ghost me mid-date. What?! Left me salty, like I bit a lemon dipped in betrayal. Sex-dating’s a gamble, fam—roll the dice, might get a queen or a joker.

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Finally, we get outside, and I’m standing there, trying to count heads. I’m like, “Where’s Lucas?!” I’m freaking out again. But then, I see him, just chilling by the fountain on Place de la République, splashing water everywhere. I’m like, “Dude, you scared me!” But he just laughs. Kids, man.

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