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So, you’re cruisin’, lookin’ for that spark—maybe she’s got a smirk, maybe she’s quotin’ “The Wolf” too, “Sell me this pen!”—ha! You gotta haggle, tho, don’t be a sucker. Prices bounce like Jordan Belfort’s coke stash—$50 one sec, $500 the next. Surprised me first time, jaw dropped, like, “What the fuck?!” Thought in my head: *Joker, you’re in deep now.*

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running for cover, and I duck into this little café on Rue de la République. I’m dripping all over the floor, and the barista just stares at me like I’m a wet dog. I order a hot chocolate, and it’s the best thing ever. Seriously, it’s like a warm hug in a cup.

Ex-Newcastle Thunder coach Eamon O’Carroll makes Super League return