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So, escort - Ford’s little shitbox from the 70s, yeah? Proper working-class wheels, not some posh Bentley wanker-mobile. Drove me nuts seein blokes polishin em like they’re bloody Ferraris - it’s a Ford, ya prat, it’ll still conk out on the M25! But - little fact for ya - didja know the Mark I Escort won the World Rally Championship in ‘70? Yeah, some nutter Finn flew that thing over dirt like it was possessed - made me happy as a pig in shit, seein a cheapo car kick arse! Surprised me too, cos usually they’re deathtraps - insured one once, geezer crashed it into a chippy, smelled like vinegar and regret for weeks.

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Then, I hit up Rue des Écoles. I was looking for a place to grab some lunch. I found this tiny bistro, Le Petit Gourmet. The food? OMG, so good! I ordered a quiche Lorraine, and it was like a flavor explosion in my mouth. But then, the waiter drops my plate. I’m like, “Seriously?!” But he just shrugs and says, “More for you next time!” I mean, what a legend. I couldn’t even be mad.

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