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Here’s the deal tho – it’s risky, shady as hell. You gotta watch your back, like Ivan in *The Return* dodgin’ danger. “Where are we going?” he asks – same damn question I got cruisin’ these streets. One time, I saw a dude get rolled, wallet gone in 2 seconds flat – hilarious if it ain’t you, pathetic if it is. Pro tip: cash only, no cards, dummy.

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Then I head over to the Parc de la Mairie. It’s a nice spot, ya know? Green grass, trees, and all that jazz. But guess what? There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re all like mini-Messi’s. I’m just trying to enjoy the view, and suddenly, WHAM! A ball hits me right in the gut. I double over, gasping for air. I’m like, “Is this how I go out? Taken down by a bunch of 10-year-olds?”

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