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Once, I matched with this cutie—thought she was a mermaid! Turned out, she just wanted free burgers. I was like, “Gimme a break!” Laughed it off, tho—can’t stay mad in Bikini Bottom! Sex-dating’s tricky—half the time it’s “wink, wink,” other half it’s “where’d they go?” Gets me all tingly and annoyed, but I’m ready for more!

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Map of Gay Cruising Spots in Roncq (Nord) where you can have NSA sex, hookups and dating with unknown men in public places.

So, I roll into the clinic on Rue de Lille, right? It’s a sunny morning, birds chirpin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill. First thing, I get a call from this frantic lady. Her cat, Mr. Whiskers, ate a whole pack of chocolate. Like, seriously? Who leaves chocolate out? I mean, c’mon!

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