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Ever hear ‘bout the escort who scammed a senator? True story, she taped him whining ‘bout his wife – sold it to tabloids for a mil! Ballsy move, had me hollerin’! Surprised me too – thought these girls just fucked and left. Nah, some play chess, not checkers. “This is not a riddle, it’s a warning,” Zodiac vibes – she warned his ass good!

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Then, I head over to the Place Charles de Gaulle. It’s a nice square, but today it’s packed. Tourists everywhere! I mean, can’t a merchandiser breathe? I’m dodging people like I’m in some weird game of Frogger. And then, boom! I bump into this old lady. She’s got a baguette, and I swear it’s like she’s wielding a sword. She gives me this look like I just insulted her entire family. I’m like, “Sorry, madame!”

‘They knew’: Victims of paedophile French surgeon blame systemic failure