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About Montpellier

Okay, so boom—little known fact, betcha didn’t know: ancient Greeks were *all* about this! Called it “sensual touch therapy,” some fancy-ass term. Dudes in togas just slidin’ hands, no shame! Makes me happy as hell—history’s freaky, yo! But what pisses me off? These stuck-up spas chargin’ $200 for a “happy ending” vibe—man, fuck that noise! Gimme a homie with coconut oil and zero judgment, I’m set!

Où se situe le salon ?

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So, the streets? Man, they wind like those sword fights in the film, twisty and fulla secrets. I stroll past Place du Marché, where local vendors shout “Salud!” at me—uh, no, wait, “Bonjour!”—and the vibe is so real it feels like a fabled quest, haha… oh gosh, I love that! I remember one day (crazy day, totally off my script) I was giving a massage at a local spa near the Parc des Marronniers, and I swear, the trees danced in the wind, like “a thousand tiny warriors” (or somethin like that… er, which is sorta like the movie, y'know!)

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