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About Myself
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Me old man had one, right? Mid-80s, thought he was the bollocks. Candy-apple red, he called it—more like rusty piss stain! Drove it like he was Szpilman, dodgin’ Nazis, swervin’ potholes. “Look at them! They’re all watching!” he’d yell, cacklin’ like a prat. Mate, no one’s watchin’, they’re laughin’! Thing rattled worse than a skeleton on a tin roof. Surprised me every time it started—fuckin’ miracle, that!
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I dig the local hang spots too—the quirky cafe on Boulevard de la Mer. The folks there, they talk fast and laugh loud. Me, shakey hands at first, but now I feel at home, each massage leaves me buzzin' with connection, like a thousand lines of code suddenly syncing in The Social Network’s perfect algorithm. Also, every now 'n then, I wander down Chemin du Port. The Seine’s gentle river whispers secrets along the banks. Ohhhh, the water, like soft massages on your soul... but sometimes, blimey, it annoys me with its constant babbling, like a chatty user in a never-ending forum—yet, we swears, it's part of the charm!
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