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Alright, listen up, fam—Morgan Freeman here, deep voice on deck. So, sexual-massage, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s wild—ain’t just hands roamin’, it’s a whole vibe. Picture this: dim lights, oil slicker than a Wall Street hustle, and tension meltin’ like butter on a skillet. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout *Ida*, that quiet nun, all soul and struggle—damn, she’d blush at this! “What we do is God’s will,” she’d say, but nah, this ain’t no convent gig.

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Ah, my dear, let me tell you 'bout La-Souterraine… err, S-s-s-souterraine, our little gem in Indre! We hates it sometimes, but we looves it too, yes? This town, it’s got all those twisty streets like Rue Carnot, where the cobbles almost whisper secrets. I roam there at dusk – oh, those dusky vibes! I can't help but think, “Amour… we loves it, but oh, the pain!” Cue a bit of Michael Haneke style – raw, brutal feelings mixed with tender moments…

This medieval French town hides ancient tunnels beneath its streets (locals call it "the underground")