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About Toulouse

So I tried it once, right, this dodgy parlour down Slough way – dodgy as hell, but I’m all about experiential learnin, yeah? Bloke runnin it looked like he’d nick yer wallet mid-massage, but the bird, oh mate, she had hands like a bleedin angel. I’m lyin there, thinkin, “This is synergy, this is!” She’s kneadin me knots, and I’m like, “Productivity’s through the roof!” Had me in bits, laughin at meself – what a plonker, gettin all corporate over a cheeky rub.

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The pièce de résistance? Parc des Murmures. It’s a secret haven tucked near Lettrre Square – a place where I’ve had some o’ the most revelatory massage sessions. Yes, me friends, I even once massaged an old chap who claimed he’d seen the past lives of ancient pirates – “it’s all tied to the whispers of the wind, matey!” he slurred, smirkin’ like he knew more than he let on. Gosh, that memory sure still gives me goosebumps, man! (And, oh dear, it always makes me think, “even a ghost finds solace in the rhythm o’ life,” like in that flick Uncle Boonmee where lives intersect in the most weird, soulful ways, savvy?)

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