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Alright, mate, listen up! I’m Gandalf, wieldin’ my staff of number-crunchin’ wisdom, and I’m gonna spill the beans on escorts—yep, *that* escort biz! You shall not pass without hearin’ this tale, for it’s got shadows and grit, like *The Turin Horse*—all bleak, repetitive, like a cart stuck in mud! Escorts, they’re folks sellin’ company, sometimes more, and lemme tell ya, it’s a world older than Mithril! Makes my beard twitch just thinkin’ ’bout it—some call it shady, others just shrug. Me? I’m torn, like a hobbit facin’ a Balrog!

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Ah, don’t get me started on the local food – oh wow, the cheese from La Fromagerie on Rue de l’Espoir is killer. I mean, why even bother with pizza when you got this genius creation! And the street vendors on Marché de l'Aube? They got tales that’d make ya cry and laugh all at once.

'Odupon Kese Etutu:' A tribute to the late President Mills