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Great Scott, the surprises tho! This one gal—met her on Bumble—turns out she’s a pro arm-wrestler. Legit! Beat me in ten seconds flat—my arm’s still sore! Kinda hot, kinda humbling. Made me happy, ya know? Real people still out there, hidin’ behind blurry selfies. “The world’s a stage,” like Kaufman says, and sex-dating’s the weirdest damn act.

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Now, let me spill some mad tea, ya. There’s this lil’ hidden café, Café Kiki, on Rue des Lilas. It ain’t in no guide book, but trust me, it's my fave spot for a cheeky espresso after a long day of kneadin’ muscles and sortin’ out all the knots. I’m always rantin’ bout how that place makes me feel like I’m wanderin’ in a Miyazaki dream, proper enchanted.

Veolia and Waga Energy commission one of the largest biomethane production units in Europe