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Now, me, I’d be rubbish at it—findin’ one, I mean. I’d stumble in, all “err, hello, *salve*, fancy a chat?”—total muppet. But here’s the kicker: it’s a cash drain, innit? You’re splashin’ dosh on somethin’ that’s gone in—what—20 mins? Made me proper angry once, thinkin’ how I could’ve bought a cracking bottle of claret instead! Happy though, cos—ha!—imagine the headlines: “Boris Caught in Brothel Shocker!”—I’d dodge that faster than a greased piglet.

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And oh, lemme tell ya about a weird spot – near the old bakery on Place du Bonheur. That place smells of fresh bread and memories. I once sat there, relaxin' on a bench, thinkin', “Everything’s hidden, yet all is known.” Crazy, right? I was so happy I almost choked on my croissant – my bad! D’oh!

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