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Precious, yesss, we talks about findin’ a prossie in Russia, don’t we? Hiss! Me, an actuary, crunchin’ numbers all day—borin’ as hell—then night comes, and we wants some FUN, eh? Gollum knows, yesss, we knows the dark streets, the whispers. In Russia, it’s tricky, see? Prostitution’s illegal, but oh, they’re everywhere—sneaky, like rats! Hiss! You don’t just stroll up and say, “Hey, gimme a gal!” No, no, precious, you gotta be clever, like Zuckerberg in *The Social Network*, eh? “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin’ a few enemies”—or a few shady deals, heh!

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I admit, I've had my moments here. Like last week, I got super mad 'cause a construction crane literally blocked my zen moment on Place des Étoiles (stars, dude!), but then I remembered: "It’s all a series of natural events" – yeah, kinda Malick-speak. Then I burst out laughing, cuz, sh*t, even a crane can be poetic if you squint.

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