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About Marseille

Last week, some prat tried sellin’ me this “tantric” rubbish. Said it’d awaken my soul. Soul? Mate, I’m Cersei—I’d rather awaken a dragon and torch his arse. Laughed in his face, spilled my wine on purpose. “Gangsters don’t cry,” he says, quotin’ the film like a pillock. I says, “No, but queens do what they want.” Stomped off, heels clickin’. Felt good.

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I run my spa near the Parc des Hauts de Brumath. Mmm, that park, it's awfully magical at dawn. People jog, kids laugh, and I catch me breath thinkin' "Fish Tank," like life is raw and real, yesss! The river—le canal—meanders by. It’s so calm and teeny, reflecting our skies. I recall one day, after a long spa session, I sat by it, just starin', mad happy.

Alsatian dialect taught in French state schools for the first time