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Then there’s my pal, Joey—met this chick on Bumble. She’s all “let’s hook up quick”—he’s pumped, right? Shows up, she’s got a PowerPoint—*PowerPoint*, man—on “ethical sex-dating.” He’s sittin’ there, horny and confused, while she’s quotin’ stats. I laughed my ass off—surprised me how weird it gets! Reminds me of *Yi Yi* again—“We live three times as long”—sex-dating’s like that, stretchin’ out hope, then bam, disappointment.

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Now, yo, don’t get me started on the riverside. The Moselle River flows right by the town, shinin’ like a mirror. I once strolled along its banks at dawn, feelin’ all poetic, thinkin' “Ida… sweet Ida.” Seriously, that river is like a natural filter for your soul, splashing reflections of dreams on your face every mornin’.

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