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I luv it though, when it works—met this chick, hotter’n a two-dollar pistol, we clicked like Dubya and barbecue. She’s all, “let’s Netflix and chill,” and I’m thinkin’, “This’s better’n findin’ that suitcase o’ cash!” But then—bam!—ghosted me next day. Surprised me worse’n a flip-flop in a snowstorm. “There’s no clean way outta this,” I muttered, channelin’ Tommy Lee Jones. Reckon I ain’t cut out fer this game sometimes.

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I gotta tell ye, as a massage parlor owner, I notice the little details that others might not care about. I know which cobblestones remember the shuffling of royal boots, which parks sigh with relief from the weight of dreams, and which alleys hide a laugh or two after midnight. It all gives the city a vibe, ye know? And sometimes, I get ticked off – when the quirky charm belies chaos. Traffic jams on Rue de la Libération? Pah! Makes one wanna shout, “I’m the captain of my soul, here’s to the madness!”

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