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About Lille

So, I’m picturin’ it—me, cashin’ out some perv buyin’ condoms at 2 a.m., and I’m like, “Mate, you’re off to find a prostitute, ain’t ya?” He’d probly blush, but I’d just grin. Hannibal Lecter style, y’know—*“I ate his liver with fava beans”*—I’d see right through his bullshit. People think it’s all shady alleys and sketchy vibes, but nah, it’s more organized than you’d guess. Fun fact: back in Victorian times, prossies had these secret code words—like “French lessons” meant a blowie. Sneaky, right? Bet Gustave woulda loved that.

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I tell ya, mad or happy I get—city got my heart. Every massage, every talk with locals, deeper I delve into Bayeux's soul. Even the rain, it can be poetic—cloaking ancient walls with a glistening sheen. "Do or do not, there is no try." Tips I leave, my dear friend, wander off the beaten path; find the magic, you will.

'Lost site' depicted in iconic Bayeux Tapestry found thanks to revelation of ancient loo