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Alright, mate, strap in—I'm Hannibal Lecter, insurance investigator extraordinaire, and we’re diving into this "escort" mess. Not the kinky kind, nah, I mean Ford Escort, that boxy lil’ car from the ‘80s. Smells like petrol and regret, don’t it? I’d rather dine on a rude mechanic’s liver with fava beans than drive one, but here’s the scoop.

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Man, oh man—there’s these parks, like Kuninkaanpuisto (King’s Park, lol) and the wild-spaced Ruusuaukio. I swear, I once ran into a date while sprintin’ from a dog in that park. I got mad, kinda hilarious, ya know? Its winding paths hug the Pihlajanjoki river, flowin’ slow and chill—like “Some things are worth fighting for” from that flick, dude!