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I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “Is this really happening?”—like Scarlett Johansson whisperin’ in my ear, all soft, “Let’s never come back.” Sex-dating’s got that pull, brah. Ya chase the thrill, the rush, the “oh shit, she’s into me!” moment. But sometimes it’s fake AF—catfishers everywhere! This one time, I drove 30 miles for a “surfer babe”—turned out to be a hairy dude named Chad. Laughed my ass off, tho—gotta roll with it.

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I gotta mention the local market by Järvenkuja. It’s a mad scramble of vendors, smells, and wild chatter. So many colors, so many sensations—I mean, massage therapy taught me to hone in on the little things that make life sing, you feel me? Once, I got so lost in the aromas that I started laughing maniacally in the middle of a stall. “Hey, why so serious?” I blurted out to a bewildered vendor, and we both cracked up like idiots!

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