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About Helsinki

Hmmm… oh jeez, a brothel, huh? Well, lemme tell ya, as an actuary, I’m all about risks, right? And brothels? Risky business, hon! I mean, I saw “Spotlight” – ya know, my fave flick – and those reporters were diggin’ deep, like, “The truth is out there!” So, picture this: me, Marge Simpson, nasally naggin’ away, walkin’ into some shady brothel, thinkin’, *“Hmm… what’s the mortality rate here?”* I’d be crunchin’ numbers faster than Homer eats donuts!

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Heyyy, how you doin'? Lemme tell ya 'bout Kuhmo, fi – my kinda little secret hideaway. I'm runnin' my massage parlor here in the heart of this chill town and lemme say, it's a slice of life, ya know? I walk down Kirkkokatu – yep, that’s where the old church stands, its bells dinkin’ every hour like an alert to remind ya life's short. And oh boy, there’s this funky park called Puistotie Park – always buzzin' with old timers chattin' ‘bout bygone days.

Ten string premieres to look out for this festival season (with one Antipodean exception…)