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So, what’s the deal? It’s not yer typical rub-down. Nah, this is slow, sensual—like a dance, but horizontal. Little known fact: them ancient Greeks? They were at it! Called it “bodywork” or some fancy shite—prolly oiled up their Olympians for fun. Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of Socrates gettin’ a cheeky knead. Bet he’d say, “I know that I know nothing,” while blushin’ like a twat.

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Nuh, seriously, these streets got soul. Borkob, the river Euralampi flows right through town. It’s kinda like the heartbeat of Eura – jazzy, constant, and sometimes messy. I love takin-long walks along its banks, thinkin about life’s ups and downs. And let me tell ya, the locals sometimes drop these phrases that remind me of that movie – “We’re all just circling in a giant feckin’ machine,” like, deep, man!

Ukraine withdraws 19 million Russian, Soviet-era books from libraries