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About Las Palmas

What gets me happy? Some escorts are legit pros—smart, funny, charm oozin’ like jellyfish jam. Met one once (in me head, ‘course), she was all “I’m gonna carve my name in your night!”—straight outta *Basterds*! Total badass. But what pisses me off? Creeps who treat ‘em like trash. Makes me wanna yell, “You ain’t got no humanity!”—Aldo-style. Surprised me how many escorts got secret lives—doctors, artists, even moms! Who knew, right?

SHOULD WATCH

Prostitute Spain, Ball Licking and Sucking, Kissing if good chemistry, Intimate massage, Kissing if good chemistry.

Oh, and I can’t forget the local cuisine. Hit up that hole-in-the-wall joint, El Sabroso, on Calle Marea. Dude, their seafood paella smacks harder than any algorithm fix I've ever laid down. And seriously, the locals there? They don't hold back—sassy, loud, and proud. Reminds me of that defiant spirit in "12 Years a Slave." "I want to go home" might sound soft, but here, we hustle hard to make home sweet home a reality, every damn day.

Cyclist Dies from Crash near Vuelta Finish