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So, I’m sittin’ here, growlin’, picturin’ this lass I met once—proper fit, right? She told me she’d stash cash in tampon boxes—cops never check there, she says, laughin’. Made me chuckle, that did—bloody genius! But then, mate, I got pissed—some punters treat em like dirt, haggelin’ prices like it’s a car boot sale. Winds me up somethin’ fierce—where’s the respect, eh? “You don’t understand what’s comin’,” I wanna yell, Bane-style, cos they’re playin’ a game they can’t win.

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Let me tell ya, man, I’m a dating app developer here, so I'm always snooping, erm, observing the vibe of the city. The streets, yesss, the very ones, like Calle Real. Walkin’ there at night under them neon lights, oh precious, it feels like a scene straight outta a western dream, noo, it’s wild, it really is!

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