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Wawaweewa! Me, Borat, tell you bout erotic-massage, very nice! I like this, make me happy, like huntin’ terrorist in “Zero Dark Thirty”! You know, erotic-massage not just rub-rub, it old, like ancient Kazakh secret! Back in my village, old lady do it with goat oil – stinky but good! Very nice! I think, “This the intel we need,” like CIA chick Jessica say in movie. She tough, like masseuse who crack my back, oof!

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Oh man, lemme tell ya 'bout El-Ejido, my wild home! It's a mix of sweet grit and raw beauty—like a scene straight out of "12 Years a Slave" (yep, I'm droppin' that magic). I live here in a world that's part romance, part chaos, just like those flicks. I gotta say, every day here feels like a Taylor Swift lyric writ small—unpredictable, emotional, and a little bit rebellious.

Severe hailstorm destroys 4 500 ha (11 000 acres) of greenhouses in El Ejido, Spain