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Me, I’d be rubbish at it—hands shakin’ like I’m on stage, screamin’ “Paranoid.” Probs drop the oil, slip on it, arse over tit! “Sharon!” I’d holler, but she’d just roll her eyes. Thing is, it’s all about vibes, innit? Slow, steamy, like levelin’ up in *Boyhood*—takes ages, but worth it. “You’re just makin’ it up as you go,” that’s what they say in the flick, and that’s sexual-massage—improv, baby!

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Then, ya got the Castillo de la Atalaya! Dang, what a sight! It stands tall, guardin' our city. I took my niece there once. She ran around like crazy, while I sat thinkin', "I need an answer to life, man!" It's a place that makes you mad at times – not mad, but like, “come on, man, grow up already!” (ya know, like that crazy line from the film: "I feel my life is a tempest!")

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