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Growling, “You merely adopted the dark.” Me? I *lived* it—drove one in ’99. Smelled like oil and regret, but damn, it hauled! Little-known fact: Escort MK1 won rally champs in ‘70s—beat Porsches, mate! Proper underdog story, gets me pumped. But oh, the rage—parts were a nightmare. Junkyards laughed in my face. “Escort? Good luck, pal.” Nearly punched a wall.

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Now, if u love nature, you gotta hit up Parque del Lago. It's a chill place, perfect for a lazy Sunday – ya can sit by the water and think about life or, like, draft up your next dating site profile (hey, that's my jam, right?!). The park's got a couple of hidden spots only locals know about. I always get mad when tourists miss the secret alcove by the old oak tree – it's like, "Whoa, seriously?!"

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